a fren of mine asked...."bape lame awk amik mase utk 'move on' ?" ....speechless....honestly, i am speechless..... i don't even noe whether i hv moved on or wut??......ape tu 'move on'? melupakan ape yg tlh berlaku, terima dgn penuh redha segala ketentuan Ilahi dan meneruskan hidup tanpa sebarang kekesalan...... in a way, move on means redha..... redha kah sy dgn segala yg berlaku? klu sy redha, kenape smpi sekarang sy masih rasa kesedihan itu?...
wut i told her, " mmg susah pd mulanya, sgt susah....sy fhm...i was in ur place....i noe how hard it was....tp, makin lama sy fikir, makin sy sedar, betapa byk hikmahnya slps itu....slps itu, sy mulai belajar berdikari....tidak bergantung pd manusia utk buat semua perkara...klu dulu, dia sentiasa ada di sisi sy utk belikan sy mkanan, belikan sy tiket lrt, teman sy utk pergi kemana2, tmn utk meluahkan rs sedih, marah, gembira...teman utk mengadu...n so on.....tp, skrg, sy byk belajar utk make things by my own....sy lebih rapat dgn keluarga...mama....abah....sy lebih rapat dgn kwn2.....sy lebih kenal dunia....pergi melihat dunia dan kenal pelbagai ragam manusia....mungkin dulu, dunia sy hanya dia....dia dan dia....sebb itu, bila dia tiada tiba2, sy bagai patah kaki....bagai hilang akal...bagai anak yg kehilangan ibu......tp, yg paling penting sy belajar dr kekecewaan dan kesedihan itu...adalah, sy semakin dekat dgn Pencipta sy.....semakin dekat dgn Tuhan....semakin dekat dgn Allah.....klu dulu sy selalu bergantung pd manusia....tp, kini sy hanya bergantung pd Dia...pd Tuhan yg satu....klu sy sedih, sy mengadu pdNya...klu sy marah, sy berdoa pdNya...klu sy susah, sy minta tolong pdNya.....sbb sy tahu, manusia itu sifatnya tidak kekal...segalanya tidak kekal....fizikalnya, pemikirannya, pendapatnya, kata2nya juga perasaannya....semuanya blh berubah.....maka, sy berjanji pd diri sy, utk tidak bergantung pd manusia lg...tetapi, hanya pd Tuhan....pd Allah krn hanya Allah shj sifatnya kekal....dan tidak pernah memungkiri janji...."
then, i added," mmg kita merancang, tp bukankah perancangan Allah itu Maha Sempurna?...bukankah Dia yg lebih tahu, apa yg terbaik buat kita?....krn Dia Tuhan kita...Dia yg ciptakan kita...makanya, Dia lah yg lebih tahu pasal kita....mcm mak kita...dia yg lahirkan kita...sbb tu dia msk n tahu sgt perangai kita...ape kita suke n ape kite x suke.....sbb tu kite mesti percaya pd Allah....letakkan sepenuh kepercayaan kita pd Dia utk Dia uruskan segala urusan kita, krn kita x tahu ape yg terbaik utk kita...tp....Dia tahu....."
she looked at me without any word...then....nodded....
p/s: thx for ur motivating comments....i do really2 appreciate them....feel free to leave ur comments here....dun worry....akak x mrh nyer.....
A story is told about a King in Africa who had a close friend that he grew up with. The friend had a habit of looking at every situation that ever occurred in his life (positive or negative) by remarking, "This is good, Allah Almighty knows best."
One day the King and his friend were out on a hunting expedition. The friend would load and prepare the guns for the King. The friend had apparently done something wrong in preparing one of the guns, for after taking the gun from his friend, the King fired it and his thumb was blown off. Examining the situation the friend remarked as usual, "This is good! Allah Almighty knows best." To which the King replied, "No, this is NOT good!" and ordered his soldiers to put his friend into jail.
About a year later, the King was hunting in an area that he should have known to stay clear of. Cannibals captured the King and took him to their village. They tied his hands, stacked some wood, set up a stake and bound him to the stake. As they came near to set fire to the wood, they noticed that the King was missing a thumb. Being superstitious, they never ate anyone who was less than whole. So after untying the King, they chased him out of the village.
When the King reached his Palace, he was reminded of the event that had taken his thumb and felt remorse for his treatment of his friend. He went immediately to the jail to speak with his friend.
"You were right" the King said, "it was good that my thumb was blown off." And he proceeded to tell the friend all that had just happened. "I am very sorry for sending you to jail for so long. It was bad for me to do this." "No," his friend replied, "this is good...Allah Almighty knows best" "What do you mean, 'this is good'! How could it be good that I sent my friend to jail for a year?"
The King's friend replied: "Remember that the Almighty knows best and if I had NOT been in jail, I would have been with you on that hunting trip."
"He knows what is before them And what is behind them: And to Allah go back All questions (for decision)" Qur'an:Surah Al Hajj 22:76
Do Not Judge Things or Events by its Immediate Outcome! Allah Almighty, the Most High, is the All-Knowledgable, the All-Knower... He chooses to show us things... but sometimes... we are not shown the wisdom behind somethings. When we are confronted by circumstances that are not very pleasing.... we are quick to say: "This is not good..." but... is it really? We might not know the purpose behind it. It might turn to be a good thing.... thus.. .when we are faced with any situation... do not be too quick to judge... always remember.... this life is a test... the good and the bad.... and there is nothing that happens for no reason...our brains are just not gifted enough to understand these reasons yet. Everything happens to us for a reason.
meet my new pet, chomel....i found her this evening...time jln2 td(pinjam kate2 awe..)...she soo cute & adorable...can't help tu bring her home....i always wanted to have a kitten as my pet...Alhamdulillah...my dream comes true....must b exciting to have chomel around...
so hope u guys help me to feed her up kay... it's okey if u wanna play with her, but....don't buli her plzz..... i trust u guys....hope u'll like my new frenz...chomel..~
p/s: td tgk blog awe..cumil sungguh chicky die... neway, thnx for sharing...
exam comes again...juz around the corner....i'm supposed studying r8 now...but, seems like can't really concentrate on wut i'm reading...i've planned to study after subuh, but then, bcoz of the cold&good weather moscow had this morning (after 2 weeks of hot&dry summer), & i barely can't open my eyes, i decide to go back to sleep after having my subuh prayer...(it's not a good example..so, don't do that k...but, i think for those who live at a country which have subuh at 3 am...emm, bolehla dimaafkan...r8? )
i miss my mum...and abah too...r8 now, both of them are spending their holidays at turky..(i'm not sure honeymoon yg keberape...)...i'm soo jealous of my parent....they are soo loving to each other.....even till now.....but, can't deny it, i'm proud&thankful 4 having a such wonderful and lovely parent like them.....
emm..suddenly, i wonder...how would it be....when i'm 40 or 50...will i have a suami soleh aka ayah mithali....or, i'll spending my hari2 tua all alone...mayb???
erkkk...isn't it too early to think about it??dah2...study2...
"(Lazimnya) perempuan-perempuan yang jahat adalah untuk lelaki-lelaki yang jahat, dan lelaki-lelaki yang jahat untuk perempuan-perempuan yang jahat dan (sebaliknya) perempuan-perempuan yang baik untuk lelaki-lelaki yang baik dan lelaki-lelaki yang baik untuk perempuan-perempuan yang baik. Mereka (yang baik) itu adalah bersih dari (tuduhan buruk) yang dikatakan oleh orang-orang (yang jahat); mereka (yang baik) itu akan beroleh pengampunan (dari Allah) dan pengurniaan yang mulia.... " (an-nur, 26)
Tika keheningan aku bagai dibuai Dinginnya malam yang panjang Tika kegelapan sayu unggas berdendang Mengubat hati yang rawan Bagaikan dinginnya malam yang suram Begitulah diriku diibaratkan
Dalam kesamaran ku rempuhi ranjau Biarpun payah ku teruskan Siapa memandang tidakkan ku hirau Biarpun pedih ku tahankan Menjelmalah bintang Beri daku sinaran Semoga hatikan cekal
Akan ku teruskan walau harus ditelan Seribu nista di tangan
Terbanglah hai unggas bebas di awan Agar kan tercapai sinar gemerlapan
Tuhan ku inginkan secebis harapan Hanya padamu ku serahkan Apakah kan ada ketulusan jiwa Yang menilai ku seadanya
Tuhan ku inginkan secebis harapan Hanya padamu ku serahkan
Tuhan ku inginkan secebis harapan Ku pasrah padamu Tuhan Tuhan......
i've tried a couple of times to write in malay..but, it seems all wrong....weird, i guess.... ermm...it's more comfortable writing in eng coz i don't feel too formal...yeah ...that's the reason actually....
lately...i mean, about these 2-3 weeks....i've started to feel that feelings again.....that feelings that i've tried to forget...tried to ignore...but, it seems too impossible....too difficult.... to not feel that kind of feelings.... mayb it's right... HE wants to test my patience....HE wants to test my iman....
P.E.A.C.E ...that's the only thing i want....why it's so hard?? for all these moment, i thought i've found the peace.....yes...by remembering ALLAH, it really makes me feel so peaceful.....but, why does that feelings kept disturbing me, took away my peacefulness.....
sumtimes, i really feel so dipressed....so empty....i kept asking myself....did i've done sumthing wrong?? or does Allah hate me?? i've tried to figure it out...looking back the past...and i admit, as a human being, we're always did mistakes aren't we?? but, one thing for sure i know without any doubt, that Allah never ever hate His slaves....He always love them....and becoz of the love, i'm still alive until today....i'm still breath the air without even a cent i have to pay.....
deep down my heart..i do believe....Allah is there for me....Allah listens...no matter wut.... no matter how sinful u are.... no matter how bad u are...becoz He is The Most Merciful, The Most Gracious......deep down my heart, i do believe that Allah knows my happiness, my sadness....and He knows wut best for me.....only then, i have to be patient waiting for the miracle to happen..... becoz i believe everything happens for a reason....Allah does not make things happen without any good from it...there must be a hikmah lies behind it.....
He knows what is [presently] before them and what will be after them. And to Allah will be returned [all] matters. (Al-Hajj : 76)
nothing i pray...nothing i ask...only His forgiveness....only His blessings....and i believe the peacefulness will b mine....insya Allah.....
p/s: finally, sum1 found my blog...accidentally found... sorry, coz u didn't found wut u're looking for, instead u found my blog.... neway, thanks for all the songs.... really love them...
Cinta pertama - Far east
Mekar di taman hati cinta pertama Engkau ciptaan seni idaman kasih Antara bibir tersiratnya pekerti Kelembutan yang mendamaikan jiwa
Bermula kau di sini penentu bicara Kalam kebenaran tiada berdusta Dirimu berharga dari segala-galannya Bertakhta keimanan untuk dipertahankan
Hadirlah cinta cinta pertama Hadirlah cinta cinta utama Sayangi diri ini cinta cinta pertama Hati ini cinta cinta utama
today is the 1st day of the 1st month of this new year 2007...nothing much to do...it's cold outside...i'd rather stay at home and finish my movie marathon...
last nite, while other peeps busy celebrating new year....watching fireworks(i wonder how much they spent for it,since until 2 am i can still hear the sound of the bunga api...neway,that's how they celebrating new year at moscow..).....so,while other people were soo bz doing that kind of stuff....i'm alone...watching this japanese series....titled...1 Litre of Tears.....it's really a sad story.....each episode,i'll cry...i didn't cry bcoz of i'm pity of her....but,i cry bcoz watching her spirit...her hope....that never fade till the last day of her life....she makes me thinking....that,as long as we're alive....no matter in what condition or situation we are,we should never lost hope...we should never lost faith.....she was a really strong gurl.....for whole this year...since that tragedy happened in my life...i kept wondering....i kept thinking....will i b strong....am i strong? can i live with it?...that's a question until now i don't have the answer...but then, when i watch aya(the gurl's name in the story)...how hard she tried to live....even she had an incurable disease.....compared to me that have a good health...suddenly, i felt like i am not being thankful for what i have now...
remember 5 things b4 5 things happen :
~healthy b4 sick
~rich b4 poor
~free b4 busy
~young b4 old
~live b4 die
happy eidul adha & happy new year....~
"Just being alive is such a lovely and wonderful thing."- Kito Aya, 1 Litre of Tears...
Cinta luar biasa.. Cinta seorang kekasih kpd umatnya Hingga pd hembusan nafasnya yg terakhir Lidah Rasulullah menuturkan tanpa henti Ummati.. ummati.. ummati..
Cinta luar biasa.. Kisah cinta Handzalah Meninggalkan isteri di malam pernikahan Lantaran menyahut seruan jihad Akhirnya syahid di medan perjuangan
Cinta luar biasa.. Seteguh kasih Khadijah Tak pernah jemu memberikan sokongan Rela mengorbankan segala kemewahan Di saat Rasulullah dan Islam dipinggirkan
Cinta luar biasa.. Kisah kesetiaan Abu Bakar Kasih seorang sahabat yg tiada tandingan Insan yg sentiasa membenarkan Sewaktu kata-kata Rasulullah dipersendakan
Cinta luar biasa.. Kisah ketabahan Hajar Ditinggalkan di tanah yg gersang bersama Ismail Bukti kasih seorang ibu yg berlarian mencari air Tatkala mendengar tangisan si anak kecil
Cinta luar biasa.. Umpama keberanian Ali Di malam penghijrahan Nabi Menggantikan Rasulullah di tempat tidurnya Walaupun jiwa menjadi taruhan
Cinta luar biasa.. Cinta Asiah, Masyitah dan Sumayyah Menggadaikan nyawa demi mempertahankan aqidah Iman di dada tak sedikit pun goyah Kerana keyakinan yg teguh atas segala janjiNya
Kisah cinta luar biasa.. Insan pilihan yg berada di atas jalanNya Betapa tulusnya kasih, teguhnya jiwa Redha dan sabar menempuh segala ujian Merekalah insan yg memahami erti kemanisan iman
Mampukah diri ini meraih cinta luar biasa..??
Ya Tuhan kami.. Beri keampunan kpd kami dan saudara2 kami yg tlh beriman lbh dahulu dr kami,dan jgnlah Engkau membiarkan perasaan hasad dlm hati kami terhadap org2 yg beriman.. Ya Tuhan kami.. Sesungguhnya Engkau Maha Penyantun lagi Maha Penyayang.. (al-Hasyr:10)
it's been a while i didn't write anything since i've started this blog.....i don't know why....everytime i want to write sumthing,seems like all the words were locked inside....i can't let it out....i juz dunno why...
but, one thing for sure, i'm not a kind of person who good in expressing my feelings......i prefer to keep them inside,coz i know no one ever understand what i feel....
and again,i don't know why,i want to share sumthing....sumthing that i feel,the most valuable thing that i must share,that i should not keep it for myself......
it was saturday, a day before Ramadhan.......my frenz and i went for a window shopping at Ismaluski....actually,showing the area around to our new juniors......it was tirying but fun......i bought a jacket,my housemate also bought a jacket....and so did our junior....=) borong satu kedai.....=p
about 3 hours later,we decided to go home....damoiii!!! but,before going home,we decided to drop by at the nearest masjid(mosque),for Zuhur prayer......even,we have to change metro(subway train)for about several times,yet it's still the nearest mosque from Ismaluski Stesen......
it was my 1st time praying at the mosque since i'm studying at moscow....the mosque is not as big as i imagined....but,the surrounding are welcoming and i can feel the peace inside my heart as soon as i walked in....
that evening, for the 1st time at moscow...i have solat asar jemaah at a mosque....as far as i can remember, the last time i have a solat jemaah at the mosque is last year,during umrah...at masjidil haram and masjid nabawi.....emm....it's really a long time....
listening to azan and praying jamaah at the mosque,make me feel so peacefull.....a feeling that i've lost...for a long time....the feeling that i don't know how to explain....but, one thing for sure...it makes me cry....it makes me realize how great is Allah....thinking back all the sins i've done,He still so loving and so gracious to give me His Bless....so that i can still breath...in this temporary world....as a place to prepare as much as we can for the eternal life, the hereafter......
"Lailahailla anta,subhanaka inni kuntu minazzalimin....fastajab na lahu...wannajjainaahu minalghammi wakazalika nunjil mu'minin..."
)...she soo cute & adorable...can't help tu bring her home....i always wanted to have a kitten as my pet...Alhamdulillah...my dream comes true....must b exciting to have chomel around...
it's okey if u wanna play with her, but....don't buli her plzz.....
i trust u guys....hope u'll like my new frenz...chomel..~
